Becoming part of the country’s intelligentsia—or at least joining the ranks of the intellectually snobbish—requires years of scholarly training and hanging out with society’s cultured elite. But for those of us who don’t have the time to realize that long-unfulfilled aspiration, there’s the Newport Beach Film Festival—a veritable cinematic crash course in becoming cultured, cool and a pseudo-, if not full-fledged, intellectual.
This tongue-in-cheek promo for the festival—in TV spot and theater trailer form—is the brainchild of a creative team at Santa Ana, Calif.-based ad agency DGWB. And it’s all done infomercial style, hawking the cultured lifestyle in a fast-talking, intentionally cheesy fashion.
The cinema ad opens on a nerdy guy hiding behind a tall plant, sloppily dripping dip as he munches on celery. A voiceover clarifies his predicament by asking: "Is a lack of culture keeping you down? Sick of hiding at those company cocktail parties?"
The next scene opens on a low-end bottle of wine. "Tired of being confused by wine?" asks the sympathetic male voiceover, as we see a woman in eveningwear, standing at her kitchen table. In despair, she pulls off the bottle’s metal lid with a corkscrew.
Next a young couple is seen arguing at an art gallery. "Of course, you could acquire culture at an art museum, but that could take days," observes the voiceover.
"You could go to the opera," it continues. "But who wants to rent a tuxedo?" In the accompanying scene a man angrily counts out his money at a tuxedo rental store. The vignette concludes with a close-up of a pair of patent leather dress shoes, which the off-camera narrator disgustedly labels "silly."
Next up is learning Swahili. "Yeah, right," says the cynical voiceover as we view a frustrated student in a language lab.
Now the narrator changes his tune: "Look, getting cultured doesn’t have to be hard—not with the Newport Beach Film Festival," enthuses the voiceover. "Now you can get all the culture you can stand, simply by watching independent films." A blonde, swim-suited model postures à la Vanna White, displaying a golden film can with the word "culture" written across it.
"That’s right! What used to take eighteen to twenty-two years of good breeding now only takes a few short hours," hawks the voiceover. The words "good breeding" and "a few short hours" flash across the bottom of the screen.
We are then subjected to a series of tacky testimonials; each person, with his or her occupation, is identified via an obtrusive super.
Construction worker Terrell Bussey relates: "I used to think that turtlenecks were for sissies. But now I know they’re just warmer." Decked out in a T-neck, he thanks the off-camera waiter who offers him an hors d’oeuvre.
Aerobics instructor Lindsey Hanson is featured next. "I just bought my first piece of abstract art," she beams. As she removes the cheap-looking modernistic sculpture from its box, one of several glittering spheres bounces off.
Physical education teacher Mitch Jensen is seen on a yacht, with his date. "Now I can say, ‘Fellini-esque,’ at parties and know what it means!" he boasts. "Thank you, Newport Beach Film Festival."
A typical infomercial tag, with flashing $5 price tag, phone number, info and advisories ("Sorry, No COD’s") then fills the screen. An inset features a photo of the model holding "culture" in a can. A voiceover says of the people who delivered testimonials, "Don’t take their word. Try the Newport Beach Film Festival for yourself. For as little as five dollars, you can make up for a lifetime of unrefined behavior."
But we’re not through yet. The spot shifts to a man on a motorcycle, his blonde, bereted girlfriend wrapped around him. He delivers a burst of rapid French to the camera. Subtitles translate: "I went to the film festival and now I can speak French fluently. Thank you, Newport Beach Film Festival!"
A final incentive is offered by the voiceover: "Act now and we’ll throw in this enlightening game of culture for free." The bare-bones game is a spinner with an arrow that points to different options, such as "try sushi," "get a passport" and "watch an opera."
The infomercial tag then reappears, followed by another offbeat pitch. An old photo of a bearded man is pictured against the backdrop of a map of Japan. The voiceover urges viewers to, "Call now and you’ll never mistake ‘Nietzsche’ for a Japanese city again."
Titled "Culture," the minute-and-38-second cinema spot (with a :30 version for TV) was directed by Rohitash Rao, who at the time was with bicoastal Moxie Pictures, but has since left that company. Producer on the job was Erik Press. The DP was Nicole Whitaker.
The DGWB creative team included executive creative director Jon Gothold, art director Dave Hermanas, copywriter Elliott Allen and producer Todd Quartararo.
The spots were edited by Bob Mori, who at the time was with Cosmo Street, Santa Monica. He has since joined Superior Assembly Editing Company, Santa Monica.
Garth O’Donnell at Encore Hollywood served as online editor and colorist. Audio mixer was Chris Winston of AudioBanks, Santa Monica.
