If you can’t find a favorable movie review, invent one—that’s seems to be what Sony Pictures did by creating a fictitious Connecticut film critic to heap praise on key theatrical releases. However, if Sony had been legitimately in the market for a truly savvy critic—and for an honest assessment of studio product—all it would have had to do was head for nearby Newport, R.I. Because that small community is a hotbed for cinema experts—at least according to this :60 trailer that promoted this month’s Newport International Film Festival (June 5-10).
Titled "Script Breakdown," the promo begins at a local gas station. As he fills up his Chevy, a twenty-something aspiring filmmaker reads aloud the last page of his script: " ‘I don’t know what it takes to be a hero. But I do know about refurbishing boats. And this one is going to sail forever.’ Fade out. Theme music swells. End credits roll."
The author’s spike-haired buddy is nearly moved to tears. "Dude, that was awesome," is his thumbs-up assessment.
"Yeah," the would-be filmmaker nods knowingly. But he’s about to get his comeuppance.
"The ending is totally predictable," says a woman filling up her minivan.
A passing gent chimes in: "Also, there’s no conflict. What’s the story really about?"
"It’s a character piece about a guy and his boat," responds the scriptwriter in his own defense.
He continues to get more than his fill at this filling station. A mechanic looks up from under a car’s hood to offer his diagnosis: "What you got is second-act problems. There’s no real obstacles for your main character to overcome."
A salty old man sitting outside the gas station’s office critiques, "Plus your dialogue is too on-the-nose."
"Your character’s got nothin’ at stake, either," contends a driver going by in his car.
"But the boat is his life," explains the author.
A sassy lass inflating her car’s tires counters, "Well, if you have to explain it …"
The only favorable reviewer—the spike-haired guy—suggests, "What if at the end he gets the girl?"
The filmmaker replies indignantly, "There is no girl."
Back to the salty senior citizen, now reading weekly Variety. He says, "Maybe that’s part of the problem."
A supered message reads, "Newport: We know movies"—an obvious reference to the film fest’s role in making the community’s residents cinema savvy.
The parting shot comes from the gas station’s elderly cashier. From behind a plate glass window, she yells into a microphone, "Sounds like you need to think about a re-write!"
David Nelson of bicoastal/international Production League of America, a division of bicoastal/international Chelsea Pictures, co-directed the trailer with his wife, Arlene Donnelly, who’s with Santa Monica-based nonfiction.spots. Nelson and Donnelly are known as the team of Vitamin when they work together on select projects. In this case, Vitamin also was the creative force behind "Script Breakdown," as Nelson wrote the piece. Donnelly additionally served as DP on the job, which was shot on location in Newport and produced by Production League of America and Chelsea.
Actors portrayed the parts of the fledgling scriptwriter and his friend. The other roles were cast with non-actor locals from Newport. The directors said they went this route for a natural aesthetic that helped to advance the absurd humor of the piece.
The commercial was edited by editor Bill Pollock of The Cutting Room, Venice, Calif. Sean Beach and Beau Leon of R!OT, Santa Monica, were the colorists. Gilbert Yablon of Film-Out X-Press, Burbank, Calif., completed the tape-to-film transfer. Audio engineer was Jason Scott of The Bakery, also in Burbank.
